This is LGBT Q’s. A new monthly feature for anyone to ask anything about and within the LGBT community. Let’s share our experiences and break down the stigma! Pop your questions to [email protected] and I, or one of the team, will answer them!
‘But who do you fancy more? Boys or girls?’ ‘How do you know you’re really bi?’ ‘But if you’re bisexual, why do you sometimes call yourself ‘gay’?’ These, and many other questions, are what I, as a bisexual, am asked on a daily basis.
Who do I fancy more? Well, I fancy both genders equally, and if anything, gender is the least important factor in a partnership. I love people for their personality, their interests and the moments we spend together. I don’t have a ‘preference’, I just love people, it’s that simple.
So, how do I really know I’m bi? How do I know I’m not 100% gay, or 100% straight? Is it weird floating around in the middle of the spectrum? Well actually, no, it isn’t! I have fallen in love with men, and I have fallen in love with women. It shouldn’t matter how many men or how many women I have loved. I don’t feel weird being between the two extremes, many people are in the middle! And no, I’m not ‘greedy’. Love is love and love is natural; when you fall in love with someone, you just fall in love with them!
Now, why do I, sometimes, call myself ‘gay’? After all, my sexuality isn’t what the dictionary would define as ‘gay’! Quite simply, I like to identify with that label, I think it works for me, just like ‘bisexual’ also does.
People can use whichever labels they wish to describe themselves, because it’s all about the individual fit.
People can even live label free! The label ‘gay’ works for me because it helps me feel more integrated into the beautiful thing which is the LGBTQ+ community. At the same time, ‘bi’ is a more factually correct description of who I love. I simply use ‘gay’ to mean ‘not straight and I’m PROUD of it!’
I think it’s beautiful that I, and all my LGBTQ+ friends, are able to be proud of who we are. I think that, simply, love is love. The fact we can love whoever we wish is such a fabulous advancement in society! Thank you for reading, I hope I made you chuckle, or that you resonated with this. And remember: if you’ve got any questions, email [email protected]